Diddle Diddle Dumpling, My Son John: Light at the End of the Tunnel
Diddle Diddle Dumpling, My Son John: Light at the End of the Tunnel
Fall of 2021 had us floundering, and I began flailing about in search of some kind of help – any kind of stable thing I could grab hold of and steady myself with.
One day when the thought trotted across my mind that dying would be a welcome relief, I did not fail to notice the giant red flag strutting along with it, and this propelled me into three conversations with three different types of witnesses: my therapist, my naturopath, and my husband, and praise the Lord they all saw me and heard me.(a)
~My therapist helped me to take a look at my thoughts and feelings, meet them with compassion, and grieve.
~My naturopath (and friend), Marisa, helped me to locate where the stress was showing up in my body and spirit in a Body Talk session (b), and helped me release the anxiety that was attached to it. As a strong believer she spoke the truth that she saw in my situation: how purposeful God was in choosing me to be Johnny's mother, and him to be my son. This was a position of honor. The Lord honored me. I realized that while the suffering was real, it was nothing compared to the amount of liberation and joy it was going to unlock for not just the two of us, and not just for our little family, but for the world... and in that moment I gained an even deeper respect and admiration for Mary, who in the face of unparalleled pain and loss – but for the sake of an even greater glory and redemption to be secured for the people God adored – responded "be it unto me as you have said."
(Am I comparing myself to Mary and my son to Jesus? Absolutely, and I will not apologize for it. The Lord Almighty works His redemption through his people every single day in a million different ways, and I am no exception... and neither are you.)
The Holy Spirit fell so heavily in my Body Talk session that it was palpable to my friends who own and operate the spa where the appointment was taking place, and we all basked in it together. At the end of the session, Marisa asked if I would like the name of a functional neurologist that she had started taking her kids to see, and I was like, "If you recommend him, abso-fricking-lutely."
So she gave me the number for a clinic and I scheduled a phone consultation and filled out a questionnaire, and the afternoon came for me to talk to Dr. Josh the functional neurologist.(c) Our conversation about Johnny lasted about 15 minutes, after which I spent the remainder of the afternoon crying because I felt like I finally had an answer, and for all the years of perplexing difficulty and pain Johnny (and the rest of our family) had to experience.
~My husband listened and commiserated while I asked him in a not-completely-joking manner one of my favorite questions: "where is the third parent???"
But this time he had an idea, and proceeded to ask someone God had recently brought into our life if she'd be willing to act as a nanny for our kids on Fridays during the school year, and she agreed.
And the heavens opened up and the angels sang.
(a) Having someone healthy on your side, whose job is to let you say everything you need to say and not judge you for it, comfort you, guide you through resolving emotional issues, and then help ground you back into reality with the tools needed to help you maintain your footing is a BLESSING and a GIFT. This is one of the ways Jesus shows His love for us, and these people can take the form of licensed therapists, naturopaths, pastors, other healing professions, and any combination thereof.
(b) What is Body Talk? It’s a method of holistic healing, the goal of which, unsurprisingly, is to decipher what the body is communicating with muscle-testing. Is there chronic pain? Disease? Mental unwell-ness? Emotional dysregulation? Is there a common source for these problems? How do they fit together, and what does the body need in order to work through and heal from them? If you're interested in knowing more or talking to Marisa, here's her website, she's on Facebook, and she has her own storefront now in Carroll, IA called Simply Wild Holistic Health. She loves the Lord, and her business is supporting and maintaining health with herbs, practicing applied kinesiology, and offering a whole bunch of other cool stuff. I recommend her highly, in case that wasn't obvious.
(c) Infinity Functional Neurology
Diddle Diddle Dumpling, My Son John: The Birth Story (so TMI and stuff)
Diddle Diddle Dumpling, My Son John: Developing