What is trauma?
A “trauma-informed Gospel” is a perspective I reference frequently, and I’m going to start delving more specifically into what I mean by it in the next few weeks. This post, written in February of 2020 and updated since, will kick us off.
“What is trauma?”
I have a couple answers to this.
One answer that I would put to you is that trauma is the human condition as the result of the fall: because of sin we were torn from our source of love and life. It’s a separation that has persisted through every generation on the earth. This is the original trauma, the original generational curse.
Another answer is that trauma is a result of hurts we’ve experienced either by infliction* or affliction** that we were not prepared to deal with and were not supported through, and that left us deeply wounded – mentally, emotionally, physically, relationally. Dr. Karen Curry Parker says trauma is “any event, circumstance, or perception that causes you to lose connection with your lovability, sense of value, and right place in the world.” That covers a lot of ground, and unfortunately that’s not all: we can also inherit the ramifications of traumas that our parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents lived through.
Trauma, as described both ways here, can adversely affect every area of our life. It results in shame, anxiety, emotional numbness or volatility, mental illnesses and disorders, chronic physical ailments and disease, addictions, workaholism, destructive behavior, isolating behavior, perfectionistic behavior, the list goes on.
While all trauma is the result of adverse experiences, not all adverse experiences result in trauma. There are hard times through which we are supported, when our needs are being met, when we let the feelings ebb and flow as they need to, when we see a future full of hope beyond the present darkness and struggle, when we can literally shake it off, shake it out. This is a wonderful thing.
Then there are times where a hard thing we experience doesn't seem bad enough to have been traumatic, and we'll brush it off or dismiss it. "It wasn't that bad. It wasn't like (horrible, commonly-accepted-as-trauma situation here [aka “big T” Trauma]), that's WAY worse,” and so invalidate ourselves, not only failing to acknowledge our own pain, but also not allowing it to be healed. Thus is created a habit of self-betrayal.
I think actually what's most difficult is to recognize when an unfortunate situation in our life did result in trauma, because oftentimes the lifestyle of coping mechanisms we've developed to compensate for our wounded-ness feels so normal that we identify with it completely: "Nothing's wrong, this is just who I am." While I see this response as a sign of our amazing capacity for pain tolerance and adaptability which allows us to keep living in spite of all kinds of hardship, it doesn’t lead to health or wholeness.
Trauma actually separates us from ourselves. It can break our hearts, our minds, our bodies. It leaves us fragmented, whether the shards of brokenness are big and obvious or small and insidious.
This is why healing work can be called integration: all the parts of us are being brought back into wholeness, into peace. This movement into peace – this realignment – is usually an uncomfortable process in itself. Healing can feel scary as we face our hurts and the behaviors we've used to be able to cope with them. It can be overwhelming when we're working to feel and resolve the things our predecessors didn't have the tools to deal with; but healing is possible, and it's our true birthright.
Restoration, resilience, support, and hope are for us, and you are not excluded.
Wholeness is for you, too.
*infliction: things done to us/words said to us by other people – intentionally or not, maliciously or not – whether as an isolated incident or perpetual behaviors
**affliction: stuff that just happens, like disease or disaster
“O afflicted one, storm-tossed and not comforted, behold, I will set your stones in antimony, and lay your foundations with sapphires.”
Isaiah 54:12
“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33
“The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound: to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor, and the day of vengeance for our God; to comfort all who mourn; to grant to those who mourn in Zion – to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit; that they may be called oaks of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he may be glorified.”
Isaiah 60:1-3